Does Couples Therapy Actually Help? What the Research (and Real Couples) Say
If you're in a relationship that's hit a rough patch—or you’ve been stuck in the same arguments over and over—you might be wondering: Does couples therapy actually work? The short answer is yes—but it depends on a few key things: your goals, timing, and willingness to do the work together.
In this post, we’ll break down what couples therapy really is, how it works, and what the research (and real couples) say about its success.
-Why Couples Seek Therapy:
Couples come to therapy for many reasons, including: Communication breakdowns, Trust issues or infidelity, Parenting conflicts, Intimacy or sexual concerns, Feeling disconnected or distant, Life transitions (new baby, job stress, relocation).
Therapy offers a structured space to work through these challenges with me, a trained couple’s therapist, by your side!
-How Couples Therapy Works
I am dedicated to help both partners explore their individual needs, identify patterns in their interactions, and build healthier ways of relating. You won’t be “ganged up on” or blamed—therapy is not about choosing sides. Instead, it’s about creating better understanding and connection.
-Popular, evidence-based methods include:
~The Gottman Method
Focuses on building friendship, managing conflict, and creating shared meaning. Based on decades of research, it’s one of the most widely used approaches in couples work.
~Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)
Helps couples identify the deeper emotional needs behind their conflicts and fosters secure emotional bonding.
-What the Research Says
Studies consistently show that couples therapy is effective for most couples who actively participate. The Gottman Institute reports that their approach can reduce conflict and increase relationship satisfaction for over 70% of couples. Research on Emotionally Focused Therapy shows a 70–75% success rate in creating lasting relationship improvement. Therapy tends to be most effective when both partners are committed and seek help early, rather than waiting until the relationship is on the brink. I often start couples therapy with the reminder that being accountable is HARD! But you are capable and supported.
-When Couples Therapy Doesn’t Work (We hate to see it)
While couples therapy can be transformative, it's not a magic fix. It’s less effective when one or both partners are unwilling to be honest or engaged. The relationship involves active abuse or untreated addiction. Therapy is used as a last-ditch effort with little commitment to change. In some cases, couples therapy may also help partners decide to separate in a healthy, respectful way. That can still be a meaningful outcome and I have helped couple’s navigate coparenting as seamlessly as possible!
-What You Can Expect in Sessions
In the beginning, we will work to understand each of your perspectives and relationship history. Together, you’ll learn how to express your needs more clearly, break unhelpful communication cycles, rebuild trust and emotional closeness, practice tools that strengthen your relationship over time, and many couples report feeling hopeful and more connected even after just a few sessions.
-Real Couples, Real Change
Couples therapy isn’t just for those in crisis—it’s for any couple wanting to grow. Even strong relationships can benefit from fine-tuning communication, deepening intimacy, and navigating life’s transitions with more support.
Many couples say things like:
“We finally feel like we’re on the same team again.”
“We understand each other in a way we never did before.”
“We stopped fighting and started listening.”
-Thinking About Couples Therapy?
If you’re asking, “Can couples therapy really help us?”—you’re already halfway there. It means you care enough about the relationship to explore a new path forward.
Let’s Rebuild Together!
Whether you’re feeling stuck or just want to reconnect, couples therapy can help you find clarity, healing, and new ways to thrive together.
Reach out today for a free 15 minute consult call!
(916)299-5596